Defining News

The American Heritage Dictionary defines the word "newsletter" as "a report, usu. Giving news or information of interest to a special group."

I mention this not because it has any relevance to the following, but because I’ve always wanted to begin an article with a definition. Besides, you people out there without a doubt are "special group".

The meaning of the dream I shared last week became crystal clear this week. I gave an interview to the St. Paul reporter on Monday (see page eight).

I wasn’t exactly misquoted, but what I said was taken out of context. I did say I wasn’t thrilled about seeing McCartney because of the Dome. I did mention Dylan and the Dead. But as most people would tell you, you could be standing next to Bob in an acoustically perfect room and still have trouble deciphering what he was singing. My complaint was more in the line of baseball being forced indoors and still harboring a grudge against that place.

Beyond that, what was printed isn’t even true now. The day following the interview, I went out and purchased a ticket to the show. So if anyone asks, it’s my evil twin Skippy sitting 450 feet away in a plastic, blue seat, munching on bad nachos…

Elsewhere in this issue there are two alternatives offered as to how to invest your new, hard-earned cash. Al suggests a practical, wise investment, while Scott’s suggestions might be a bit more risky.

My suggestions are less in the form of an investment, more in terms of actual ways to spend the cash. These of course will not make you richer, but maybe they will make you a better happier person.

Last winter I was suffering through illness after illness. From one who usually is a healthy little guy, I decided something needed to be done. So I bought a humidifier. After suffering from cold after cold, and dry, irritable skin, my purchase brought immediate help.

Disregarding preceding tidbits, how about Twins’ season tickets? This season promises to be interesting, a lot of runs will be scored at the Dome this year, some of them by the Twins. After a disheartening start, the decision was made to get rid of two pitchers who had no business being in the major leagues: Brett Merriman and Larry Casian. Unfortunately, we’ve replaced them with George Tsamis (Eight plus E.R.A. at Portland) and Richard Garces (Seven plus E.R.A. at Portland). If you sit in the outfield this year, there is a good chance you’ll be exposed to a lot of flying balls.