Dave's Top Five Responses to Being Approached in a Red Neck/Blue CollarBar and Told, "You Really Shouldn't Be in Here."
5) "Why, this isn't a gay bar?"
4) "Oh yeah? Well my friend Nancy here, can kick your pasty white thighs any day of the week, Regis."
3) "The way the light reflects off your red neck really does something for me."
2) "I'm only here to meet my friend, Louis Farakhan, and then we'll be going."
1) "No, it's okay, I left my sheet and hood at the coat check."
We seem to have a running theme this week. Much as it shouldn't matter, the way something looks is often times more important than the way it really is. Hard as we try, we all bring preconceived emotions, prejudices with us whenever we encounter something new. It's those who can overcome that, or learn how to question and challenge their own thoughts and feelings that benefit from the full range of human experience.
Events, products, actions, people that seemingly have little in common, more often than not do. This comes to mind because after work last Friday, I went to the Gopher Bar in St. Paul, with a co-worker. She's a striking blonde woman, tall and attractive. On my best days I'm five feet five and with my pomposity for wearing hats, we made quite a sight strolling into this blue collar bar. Granted, it wasn't quite Bridget Loves Bernie, but to the uninformed one might have been asking, what is wrong with this picture?
Yet, having just viewed Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story, the night before, it occurred to me that sometimes differences are more alike than they appear to the judgmental eye. A new friend had recommended the movie to me, and I can see why. She happens to be another youthful looking, blonde woman who has found people at the very least, don't take her seriously upon first impression, because of stereotypical beliefs associated with her sex, hair color, apparent age, etc. Why should this person have to prove herself in a deeper way than others? The depth is apparent to those who seek such things, but in a way she has to disprove the prejudices before she can even begin proving herself; and that's something I can relate to but never understand. I may not be a blonde bimbo, but I'm not exactly a martial arts student either, despite what you see.
The way you get around that, the way you learn to tolerate it, is to accept that it's less painful thus better to be rejected because of your outside appearance rather than have your insides be found to be lacking in some sort of way. You also learn that often times it is better to be different. It may be more work, a harder struggle, but in the end it gives more fulfillment.
So how does this relate to you (and when I say you I really mean us)? Well, I went out to rent the movie last week, and remembered that my insurance agent told me his wife had a video store near where I live. Recently a Blockbuster opened up across the street and since then, her business has seriously declined. So, I figured I would bring her some new business. Unfortunately, I stopped by and her store wasn't open. It was 11:00 in the morning and I didn't feel like waiting another hour, coming back just to rent a movie I knew I could get at Blockbuster. So I went there instead. The lesson learned is if you begin with less resources, if you begin behind, you have to do extra work, you have to think twice as hard, to create a unique image and beat that big obstacle across the way.
5) "Why, this isn't a gay bar?"
4) "Oh yeah? Well my friend Nancy here, can kick your pasty white thighs any day of the week, Regis."
3) "The way the light reflects off your red neck really does something for me."
2) "I'm only here to meet my friend, Louis Farakhan, and then we'll be going."
1) "No, it's okay, I left my sheet and hood at the coat check."
We seem to have a running theme this week. Much as it shouldn't matter, the way something looks is often times more important than the way it really is. Hard as we try, we all bring preconceived emotions, prejudices with us whenever we encounter something new. It's those who can overcome that, or learn how to question and challenge their own thoughts and feelings that benefit from the full range of human experience.
Events, products, actions, people that seemingly have little in common, more often than not do. This comes to mind because after work last Friday, I went to the Gopher Bar in St. Paul, with a co-worker. She's a striking blonde woman, tall and attractive. On my best days I'm five feet five and with my pomposity for wearing hats, we made quite a sight strolling into this blue collar bar. Granted, it wasn't quite Bridget Loves Bernie, but to the uninformed one might have been asking, what is wrong with this picture?
Yet, having just viewed Dragon: The Bruce Lee Story, the night before, it occurred to me that sometimes differences are more alike than they appear to the judgmental eye. A new friend had recommended the movie to me, and I can see why. She happens to be another youthful looking, blonde woman who has found people at the very least, don't take her seriously upon first impression, because of stereotypical beliefs associated with her sex, hair color, apparent age, etc. Why should this person have to prove herself in a deeper way than others? The depth is apparent to those who seek such things, but in a way she has to disprove the prejudices before she can even begin proving herself; and that's something I can relate to but never understand. I may not be a blonde bimbo, but I'm not exactly a martial arts student either, despite what you see.
The way you get around that, the way you learn to tolerate it, is to accept that it's less painful thus better to be rejected because of your outside appearance rather than have your insides be found to be lacking in some sort of way. You also learn that often times it is better to be different. It may be more work, a harder struggle, but in the end it gives more fulfillment.
So how does this relate to you (and when I say you I really mean us)? Well, I went out to rent the movie last week, and remembered that my insurance agent told me his wife had a video store near where I live. Recently a Blockbuster opened up across the street and since then, her business has seriously declined. So, I figured I would bring her some new business. Unfortunately, I stopped by and her store wasn't open. It was 11:00 in the morning and I didn't feel like waiting another hour, coming back just to rent a movie I knew I could get at Blockbuster. So I went there instead. The lesson learned is if you begin with less resources, if you begin behind, you have to do extra work, you have to think twice as hard, to create a unique image and beat that big obstacle across the way.
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