Monday, April 7, 2003

More Than You'll Ever Know

Underneath grandpa's dresser
Where you've seldom been before
The forlorn look in your eyes
Like you can't take it anymore

I don't want you to hang on
Just for my grieving sake
Yet I don't want you to let go
'Cuz my heart's about to break

I watch as your breathing
Gets harder and distressed
At complete loss what to do
My love was never the best

Reaching out for help
More for me than for you
Yet I'm not the one leaving
I wondered if you knew

Feeding you through a tube
Losing your one constant joy
Trying to bolster your spirit
I feel like a little lost boy

You crawl into the bathtub
Eyes peeping out sadly seeing
Solitude and bewilderment
Absorbed in your entire being

Can't let go or admit the truth
I know the end is achingly near
You sit still and just look ahead
A call to one who holds you dear

Kindness to keep us company
Afraid to turn on the icy streets
Listening for your breathing
An obstacle thicker than sleet

The receptionist takes you in
I'm distraught I must admit
Trying to look brave as I could
Like a shaking leaf I quietly sit

Two of us alone in the room
They bring you in all prepared
I say a lasting tearful goodbye
Remembering all we shared

Time it doesn't matter
A floor without a door
The look in your eyes
Tells me what's in store

Fluid flows as I give the go
They warned me about the rest
Eyes opened more than wide
Holding me tight to her breast

Happy ever after
Once upon a time
Friendships last forever
In memory of the sublime

War's broken out since you left
And my pen can't even express
The sadness that surrounds
The chronically sleepless rest

Can't get it out of my mind
The week that was your last
Can't get it out of my heart
A blink of an eye it passed

Every day is the same day
As the one that came before
Your absence is a presence
That simply cannot be ignored

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